Trying to comprehend it all

It is surreal…unbelievable…bizarre…

One year ago, I was sorting, packing, cleaning, and fixing up our house for the soon to be new owners of our home of just over 10 years. At first the thought of moving again was exciting and romantic. So, in February 2013, I wrote “Just Two of Us”

March and April, my husband and I went back and forth between Nebraska and Montana. While in Nebraska we readied our house for its new owners. When in Montana, house hunting was my main focus, yet I attempted to participate in the April A-Z Blog Challenge—and not very successfully. I found my "walk by faith" shoes forming blisters as we were “Living in Limbo” as a homeless couple between houses.

May didn’t bring us flowers, but more intense house hunting, more disappointment, and more confusing stress. Finally, near the first of June, hope arrived…a house was found, a contract signed, and paperwork became the focus.

We signed a stack of papers on July 3, received the key, and moved our sparse apartment furnishing into a new Montana home. Ten days later all of our worldly goods arrived. The Old was Gone and our new life had begun. Ah. Relief. Rest, body, spirit, and soul.

Fast forward 8 months to this week.

I am in Denver for the sole purpose of looking for a new place to live. Sitting here in our hotel room, I’m trying to comprehend it all. I’m trying to unravel the confusion in my head. I’m trying to let go of my “why” questions.

“Trust in the Lord with all your heart…Lean on, trust in, and be confident in the Lord with all your heart and mind…” I have clung to this passage many times and I’m trying to lean on, trust in, and be fully confident in the Lord with all of my heart and mind.

“…do not lean on your own understanding… do not rely on your own insight or understanding.” I’m trying to let go of my right to understand and of the way I think things should be. But I’ll admit I’m struggling with everything that has happened the last 15 months.

“In all your ways acknowledge Him… know, recognize, and acknowledge Him…” I acknowledge His sovereignty. I acknowledge His all-knowing, all-wise, all-perfect ways which are higher than mine could ever be. I acknowledge His provisions throughout it all. I acknowledge His strength to pull me from the edge of deep despair. I feel His presence with every step we take as I walk by faith more than in any other time of my life. He is good. He is Holy. His hand holds me tightly. I acknowledge Him.

“…And He will make your paths straight…He will direct and make straight and plain your paths.” He will lead me and guide me in the way He wants me to go for His purpose and His glory. He will make a way when there seems to be no way. He will make it successful…

…when I trust and obey. When I let go and let God lead. When I acknowledge Him.

Proverbs 3:5-6

“Trust in the Lord with all your heart And do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, And He will make your paths straight.” (nasb)

“Lean on, trust in, and be confident in the Lord with all your heart and mind

and do not rely on your own insight or understanding.

In all your ways know, recognize, and acknowledge Him,

and He will direct and make straight and plain your paths.” (amp)

Do you struggle to trust without understanding?

Remember (and I’m talking to myself here),

trusts comes from acknowledging Him,

from recognizing Him for who He is.